The Hockey Resource - Referees Do's and Dont's (2)

Do’s and Dont’s when Communicating with Hockey Referees (Anonymous Author)

Let’s face it: referees can sometimes frustrate us and sometimes even cause some of us to lose control of our emotions. We may feel they are unfair, calling for penalties we don’t see and letting the other team get away with everything. The truth is that referees are human and make mistakes. They aren’t out to get you; they generally get things right. However, when we feel they have slighted us, we often form an unwarranted negative opinion, causing some of us to behave poorly and make a scene. It’s okay to voice your opinion to a referee, but it should be done professionally and courteously. Here are some do’s and dont’s of referee communication for coaches, parents, and players.

Coaches

Do: Introduce Yourself and Your Team

Youth Hockey referees are serving your team and the league, so it may be nice to introduce yourself and show professional courtesy. They will be relieved to see they are working with a calm, personable coach rather than someone who views them as the enemy. They take a lot of undeserved heat, so making them feel welcome in the league can help strengthen your relationship with them. This isn’t to “grease the wheels” but to show appreciation for their work.

Don’t Try to Gain Unfair Advantages

Some youth leagues occur in tightly knit communities where many people know each other. Even if the ref is your best friend, you shouldn’t try to gain an advantage over the other team. This is dishonest and will only hurt your team in the long run if they benefit from sloppy play. The referees are there to do a job; you should let them do it objectively.

Do: Respectfully Tell Your Opinions

If you feel that a ref made a bad call, tell him why you think this way is okay. Perhaps refer to a rulebook or point out that he might have missed something on the other end of the ice. As mentioned before, refs are human and will make mistakes. Being respectful in your objections to their calls will make them respect you and more likely listen to your viewpoint.

Don’t Insult or Berate the Refs for Missed Calls

The refs are people, too, and it doesn’t help anybody on the ice if you start hurling insults at them because you feel your team got the short end of the stick. It could give the refs a poor opinion of your ability as a coach and might have parents wondering the same thing. You don’t want to create grudges or embarrass your team, so bite your tongue even if you feel it’s the worst call you’ve ever seen. It could also result in you getting a penalty!

Parents

Do: Show Respect for the Officiating Crew

Everyone wants their kid to play well and remain safe on the ice, and the refs are a big part of that. They are trained to make the calls that should help minimize the risk of injuries and keep the game progressing fairly and smoothly. You should be glad they are on the ice and looking out for the kids' safety. Tell them you appreciate their efforts and congratulate them on a well-done job. They will be thankful for parents like you.

Don’t Yell at or Taunt the Refs from the Stands

So, your kid had a great chance at a goal, and you think the ref made a poor call that took it away from him. You may be correct, but chances are that the trained referee had a better view of the play and a more thorough understanding of the rules, and he deserves the respect that comes with that. Even if you feel it was a blatant missed call, you will do everybody a favour if you hold it back and let it ride. This is youth Hockey; the most crucial part is that the kids have fun and improve their skills. A loudmouth, an angry parent in the crowd, ruins that for everybody.

Do: Wait Until After the Game to Speak with Refs

If you want to talk to a ref to show appreciation or discuss something about the game, be courteous and wait until afterwards. The ref has a job, and it’s disrespectful to everyone to interrupt during the game. Wait it out, and in most cases, you can speak to the ref afterward.

Players

Do: Thank the Ref for Working the Game

The refs work very hard and are often underappreciated, so thank them and show that you’re happy to have them there. You might not always think they make the right call, but they follow a fast-paced game and work hard. Let them know they are valued members sharing the ice with you.

Don’t Complain About Past Calls

Whether the call happened 2 months or 2 minutes ago, don’t hold onto grudges or dwell on mistakes. You will come off as angry and immature and won’t gain any favour in the referee's mind. If something goes your way, keep your head up and continue playing the game as you always do. The ref won’t likely change his call anyway, so you aren’t helping anyone by continuing to chirp at him. This will also distract you from focusing on your game and can result in a penalty.

Don’t Use Foul or Offensive Language Toward the Refs

Like coaches and parents, players are responsible for being respectful and playing the game correctly. The ref can kick you out of the game for unsportsmanlike conduct, so keep it clean and appreciative. You don’t want to hurt your team just because your temper got the best of you.

Do: Compliment the Ref on a Job Well Done

Whether he saw something from across the ice or had a solid officiating game, give the referee the compliments he deserves. It isn’t easy to officiate a Hockey game, so he’ll appreciate your noticing his talent and good eye.